He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
