Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
