wat bout pragnant strippers??
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
