I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
