This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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