You just made me feel so damn special
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
