Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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