I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
