no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
