I think scott just propositioned me for sex
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
