So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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