brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
