Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
