and my herpes radar will keep us safe
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
