im gay
i know
yea but for you.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
