making cat noises will not fix the situation.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
