I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I think a kid would responsible me up
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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