I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
