I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
