Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
