Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
