But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
