At least make sure they are 18
Why
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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