i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
do herpes really smell.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
