You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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