I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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