I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
