Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
So much rum. So many feels.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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