He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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