Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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