So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
