i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
