R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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