I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
