I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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