He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
