I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
vagina is talking i cant
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
