was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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