Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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