Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
