Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
