I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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