Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
