I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Randomize
