it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
