But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
organizing the empties. That sober.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
