In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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