Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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