Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
