I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
